Dive into the deep end of humor with our reel-y funny collection of fish puns. From guppies to great whites, these aquatic quips are sure to tickle your funny bone and make your day a little brighter. So, come on in – the water’s fine!
- “I tried to tune my guitar today, but I just couldn’t find the right ‘bass’.”
- “Why do fish always know what’s going on? Because they stay current.”
- “Did you hear about the fight in the kitchen? A fish got battered.”
- “I told my wife she should scale back her spending. She said ‘I’m not a fish’.”
- “I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it!”
- “The fish got caught because it couldn’t keep its mouth shut.”
- “Why don’t fish play basketball? They’re afraid of the net.”
- “Do you know what you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.”
- “You know what’s Kraken me up? These sea puns.”
- “Why don’t fish like computers? They can’t handle the ‘nets’.”
- “Did you hear about the fish who could play the piano? He had good scales.”
- “Why are fish so smart? Because they swim in schools.”
- “What do you call a fish with a crown? A king fish.”
- “What’s a fish’s favourite TV show? Whaley Fortune.”
- “How do you make an Octopus laugh? With ten-tickles!”
- “Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.”
- “What does a fish say when it runs into a wall? Dam.”
- “What is a fish’s favourite card game? Go fish.”
- “Why don’t fish like to write essays? They get hooked on the introduction.”
- “Why do fish live in saltwater? Because pepper water makes them sneeze.”
- “Why did the fish stay home from school? Because he was feeling a bit eel.”
- “I once dated a fish, but we broke up. It just wasn’t my sole mate.”
- “Why did the fish go to Hollywood? He wanted to be a starfish.”
- “What do you get if you cross a banker with a fish? A Loan Shark.”
- “Why are fish easy to weigh? Because they have their own scales.”
- “What kind of fish performs operations? A sturgeon.”
- “What did one fish say to the other? Keep your mouth shut and you’ll never get caught.”
- “What did the fish say when he posted bail? ‘I’m off the hook!'”
- “Why are fish never good at basketball? They have a fear of nets.”
- “Did you hear about the fish that went to a concert? He was really hooked on the band.”
- “What do fish use for money? Sand dollars.”
- “Where do fish go to do their banking? The river bank.”
- “What is a fish’s least favourite day of the week? Fry-day.”
- “What is a fish’s favorite song? ‘Under the Sea.'”
- “What do you call a fish that can do magic? A magic carp.”
- “Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the sea’s bottom.”
- “What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant? Swimming trunks.”
- “What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee fish.”
- “What’s a fish’s worst grade in school? Below sea level.”
- “What do you call a fish that destroys Japan? Cod-zilla.”
- “What did the mom fish say to her child? You’re so-fin special.”
- “Did you hear about the fish that likes to eat beans? He’s a human bean.”
- “What’s a fish’s favourite musical? ‘Salmon-chanted Evening.'”
- “What do you call a fish that knows addition? An octoplus.”
- “What do you get when you cross a fish and a banker? A loan shark.”
- “Why do fish like to eat worms? Because they’re hooked on them.”
- “Where do fish keep their money? In the river bank.”
- What do you call a fish who works in an office? Clerkfish.”
- “What did the fish say when he hit the wall? Dam.”
- “Why did the fish go on vacation? He wanted to see a new stream.”
- “What’s a fish’s favorite country? Finland.”
- “What do you call a fish that’s gone bad? Unreel.”
- “What do you call a fish who works as a maid? A cleaner wrasse.”
- “Why don’t fish ever get lost? Because they always follow the school.”
- “What do you call a fish that needs help with his or her vocals? Autotuna.”
- “What do you call a fish that wears a crown? The king of the sea.”
- “What’s the difference between a fish and a musical instrument? You can’t tuna fish.”
- “Why did the fish go to school? To become a little more ‘fin’formed.”
- “Why do fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales.”
- “What did the detective fish say to his partner? Something’s fishy here.”
- What did the fish say to his friend when he made a joke? ‘You krill me!'”
- “What did the fish say when he broke up with his girlfriend? ‘I’m reel-y sorry.'”
- “Why did the fish cross the sea? To get to the other tide.”
- “Why don’t fish ever watch their weight? Because they’re always in the swim of things.”
- “Why did the fish go to the opera? To catch the high seas.”
- “What is a fish’s favourite game? Salmon says.”
- “What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant? A swimming trunk.”
- “What’s a fish’s favourite note? The B-sharp.”
- “What do you call a fish with no tail? A ‘one eyed jack’.”
- “Why did the fish refuse to play cards? The deck was stacked against him.”
- “What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh!”
- “Why did the fish take the bus? He had no car-p.”
- “What do you call a lazy crayfish? A slobster.”
- “Where do fish save their money? In a sand bank.”
- “Why do fish live in schools? Because they can’t afford condos.”
- “What do you call a fish with a foul mouth? A bass-turd.”
- “What do you get when you cross a fishing lure with a gym sock? Hook, line and stinker.”
- “What do fish use to make a phone call? A shell-phone.”
- “What do you call a fish that knows how to fix websites? A herring-aided designer.”
- “Why don’t fish go on vacation? They’re always in school.”
- “What do you call a fish magician? A squidini.”
- “How do you communicate with a fish? Drop it a line.”
- Why did the octopus cross the road? To get to the other tide.”
- “Why don’t fish pass their exams? Because they work below C-level.”
- “Why did the fish get kicked out of school? Because he was caught with seaweed.”
- “Why don’t fish like to take tests? They find it hard to get to the bottom of things.”
- “Why are fish never in debt? They always keep their scales balanced.”
- “Why did the fish go to the casino? He was a real card shark.”
- “What do you call a fish that destroys everything in its path? A bulldozer.”
- “Why did the fish go to school? He wanted to be a ‘fishtorian’.”
- “What do you get when you cross a fish with a rabbit? A bunnyfish.”
- “Why do fish always know where they’re going? They have a good sense of scampass.”
- “What do you call a fish who can’t keep a secret? A blabbermouth bass.”
- “Why are fish such good musicians? They’ve got the scales.”
- “Why did the fish go to the doctor? He had a gill-ache.”
- “Why did the fish join the navy? He wanted to be a sub-mariner.”
- “Why did the fish get bad grades? He was below C level.”
- “Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the sea weed.”
- “Why are fish so well educated? Because they swim in schools.”
- “What do you call a fish with two knees? A tunee fish.”
- “What do you call a fish who’s gone into business? An entrepreneur.”
- “What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Dam.”
- “Why don’t fish play football? They’re scared of the net.”
- “What do you call a fish with a missing eye? Fsh.”
- “What do you call a fish that wears a crown? A king fish.”
- “What do you call a fish that knows the way? A path-finder fish.”
- “Why did the vegan go fishing? Just for the halibut.”
- “Why do fish never know their weight? Because they have scales.”
- “Why did the fish cross the road? To get to the other tide.”
- “Why don’t fish play piano? They’re scared of the keys.”
- “Why don’t fish go to war? They’re paci-fishts.”
- “What do you call a fish that can sing? A tuna fish.”
- “Why don’t fish pass their exams? Because they work below C level.”
- “Why did the fish refuse to play cards? He was afraid of sharks.”
- “Why don’t fish like basketball? They’re afraid of the net.”
- “Why are fish never good at basketball? They always miss the net.”
- “Why did the fish get bad grades? It was below C level.”
- “Why did the fish go to the doctor? He had a sea-zer.”
- “Why are fish so clever? They swim in schools!”
- “What’s a fish’s favourite part of a newspaper? The fishwrap.”
- “Why did the fish cross the playground? To get to the other slide.”
- What do fish read every day? The Daily Plaice.”
- “What do you call a fish who likes to do experiments? A labracadabra.”
- “Why don’t fish like to talk? Because they’re afraid they’ll get caught.”
- “Why do fish always win at debates? Because they always have a good point.”
- “Why did the fish go to the party? He heard it was off the hook.”
- “What do you get when you cross a fish with a Hollywood actor? Starfish.”
- “What did the fish say when it ran into a concrete wall? Dam!”
- “Why don’t fish play basketball? Because they’re afraid of the net.”
- “What do you call a fish that can pick up a radio station? A tune-a fish.”
- “What do fish use to communicate with each other? A shell-phone.”
- “Why are fish so smart? Because they’re always in schools.”
- “What do you call a fish that floats on the surface? Bob.”
- “What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Dam.”
- “What do you get when you cross a fish with a kangaroo? A jumpstart.”
- “Why don’t fish go to work? They’re already working overtime swimming in schools.”
- “What’s a fish’s favourite TV show? ‘The Real Housewives of the Seaweed.'”
- “Why did the fish join a band? Because he had the drums.”
- “Why are fish so well-educated? Because they always stay in schools.”
- “Why did the fish go to the bank? To check his current balance.”
- “Why did the fish go to school? To improve his ‘edu-cod-tion’.”
- “Why did the fish go to the party? To raise the ‘bass’.”
- “Why are fish never in debt? Because they always keep their scales balanced.”
- “Why don’t fish like to talk? They’re afraid of net-working.”
- “Why did the fish go to the party? To have a whale of a time.”
- “What do you call a fish that’s a knight? Sir Loin of Fish.”
- “Why don’t fish like basketball? They always miss the net.”
- “What’s a fish’s favourite note? The B-sharp.”
- “Why did the fish go to school? To become a ‘fishtorian’.”
- “Why did the fish join a band? He was good with the bass.”
- “Why don’t fish play football? They’re scared of the net.”
- “Why did the fish go to school? To get a little more ‘edu-cod-tion’.”
- “Why did the fish join a band? He had the drums.”
That’s the end of our swim through the sea of fish puns. We hope they netted you some laughs and brightened your day. Don’t hesitate to share these gilled giggles with your fellow humor-lovers. Until next time, remember to keep swimming through life with a smile!