50 Dallas Cowboys Jokes to Tackle Your Funny Bone

Get ready for some football-themed humor with our roundup of 20 Dallas Cowboys jokes that will tackle your funny bone! Perfect for NFL fans, these jokes offer a playful ribbing of one of America’s most recognized football teams. Whether you cheer or jeer the Cowboys, these jokes are sure to score a laugh.

jokes about the dallas cowboys
  1. Why don’t the Dallas Cowboys drink tea? Because the Patriots have all the cups.
  2. Why did the Dallas Cowboy bring a ladder to the game? He heard the standards were too high.
  3. Why do Cowboys fans carry lighters? You can’t burn disappointment.
  4. Why was the Dallas Cowboys playbook covered in icing? They wanted to sweeten their plays.
  5. How do the Cowboys spend the first week of training camp? Studying the Miranda Rights.
  6. Why did the Cowboys go to the bakery? Because they needed a good “roll” model.
  7. What do you call a Cowboys fan with a Super Bowl ring? A thief.
  8. Why are the Cowboys like a possum? They play dead at home and get killed on the road.
  9. Why did the Cowboys go to the auto shop? To get their drive back.
  10. What’s the difference between the Cowboys and a dollar bill? You can get four quarters out of a dollar.
  11. Why did the cowboy date a map? Because he heard about all the successful routes.
  12. How are the Cowboys like my neighbors? They can’t pick up a single yard.
  13. Why did the Cowboys open a bakery? They’re really good at turnovers.
  14. Why do the Cowboys always eat their lunch alone? Because they can’t find anyone who can catch.
  15. Why are Cowboys players like grizzly bears? Every fall, they go into hibernation.
  16. What do you call a cowboy with a championship belt? A rodeo star, because it sure isn’t a football player!
  17. What do the Cowboys and a Chick-fil-A manager have in common? Neither one shows up for work on Sunday.
  18. What’s the difference between the Cowboys and my email? My email has a better chance of a successful delivery.
  19. What do the Cowboys and the mailman have in common? Neither delivers on Sundays.
  20. Why don’t Cowboys fans have garage sales? Because they’re always out of yards.
  21. Why did the Dallas Cowboy bring a pencil to the game? Because he wanted to draw a win.
  22. What’s the difference between a Cowboys fan and a baby? The baby will stop whining after a while.
  23. Why are the Cowboys like a politician? Both make a lot of promises, but don’t deliver.
  24. What do Cowboys fans use as birth control? Their personalities.
  25. Why did the Cowboy go to the bank? To get his quarterback.
  26. Why do Cowboys players make bad comedians? Their timing is always off.
  27. Why are the Cowboys like my desk? They both have less than a dozen good points.
  28. Why did the Cowboy bring string to the game? Because he wanted to tie up loose ends.
  29. Why did the Cowboys open a gardening service? They’re good at raking up losses.
  30. How is a Cowboys fan like a computer? They both have to be rebooted every Sunday.
  31. What’s the difference between the Cowboys and my high school math book? The math book has more points.
  32. What do the Cowboys and bananas have in common? They both peel under pressure.
  33. Why don’t Cowboys players use bookmarks? Because the coach uses the playbook.
  34. Why do the Cowboys play in a dome? God can’t watch!
  35. Why did the Cowboy take his team to the zoo? He needed them to learn what a lion looks like.
  36. What do the Cowboys and mosquitoes have in common? They can’t get a score without sucking.
  37. What’s the difference between the Cowboys and a pinball machine? The pinball machine scores more points.
  38. Why did the Cowboy become a farmer? He wanted to know what it’s like to get a field goal.
  39. Why did the Cowboy carry a car door to the game? If it got too hot, he wanted to roll down the window.
  40. Why don’t the Cowboys make coffee? They can’t even grind it out on the field.
  41. Why did the Cowboy bring a horse to the game? He was told he needs a better running back.
  42. What do you call a cowboy who can play the piano? An off-key player.
  43. What’s the difference between the Cowboys and a mosquito? A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.
  44. Why did the Cowboy go to school? To get a little more pass completion.
  45. What do you call a cowboy with half a brain? Gifted.
  46. Why do the Cowboys always carry a deck of cards? Just in case the coach calls for a “deal.”
  47. What’s the difference between the Cowboys and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.
  48. Why did the Cowboy bring duct tape to the game? He heard he needed to hold the line.
  49. Why do the Cowboys never play hide and seek? Because no one would look for them.
  50. How is a Cowboys fan different from a baby? Eventually, the baby grows up and stops crying.

We hope these Dallas Cowboys jokes had you grinning from ear to ear! Humor, like football, brings people together and sparks joy, even in the midst of competition. So stay tuned for more fun and laughter, reminding us that whether you’re on the football field or in the field of life, a good sense of humor is always a winning play.